Wednesday, August 10, 2011

surprise parties give me ulcers.

so today, august 10th,
(i'm a night blogger, sorry)
is michele's 27th birthday.
and a few weeks ago, rita and i came up with the great idea
to throw her a really rad indian party.
red dot.
not feathers.
i'm pretty sure indians have more fun than anyone on earth.
i kinda wish i were indian
just so i could dress up
and party like one.
ok, not kinda, i really do.

enough about indians.
when we approached spouse about when we could throw the party,
he told us he had plans of his own
for us to throw a party for her.
a surprise party.

but he wanted to change all the rules.
no indian henna.
no indian belly dancing.
no indian jewel'd faces.
no indian food.
no indian music.
no indian outfits.
pretty much,
no. indian. theme.
buh buh booooring.

but since he's michele's spouse,
and she kinda loves him,
we obliged
and changed the theme to his idea:

{sweets and treats}

the day of the party i pretty much ran around like
a chicken with it's head cut off
trying to make and bake and prepare
everything for the party.

my nose had been pouring like a flippin faucet
all. day. long.
so when i showed up at rita's house to set up
i had to take preventative measures
to protect the food spread.

rita, of course, had to document.

we rushed around, trying to set up,
until the very last moment.
we even enlisted the help of the guests
as they arrived.
how rude is that.
i know.
but i don't care.

to help us stay sane,
(which it didn't because i still went insane
and started sweating like a horse)
we had friends pitch in and bring treats too.
we asked guests to work.
rude again i know, but still, don't care.

amylouwho made a delectable
raspberry lemonade punchy.
i stirred it.

mo-gin hung black and white pictures
that documented good times.
and britt bent over and showed us how she takes it.
oh my gosh.
did i just type on my blog?
i mean makes it.
pretty things.
she makes them. while bent over.

once everything had arrived
and been set up,
it. looked. terrific.
(lindsey tells us we should use that word more often)
feel free to pinterest this picture.
cuz it's pretty much awesome.
oh and you want to see
my motivation for this sweet spread?
(no really, don't cuz then you'll see
how bad mine looks in comparison, mmkay?)

the black and whites
formed the number '27'
on a wall of pink and silver balloons.

the sweets and treats were
mouthwateringly divine.

fruit with cream cheese dip
veggies and ranch dip
chicken salad
cake pops
homemade salsa
mini fruit pizzas
chocolate dipped strawberries
jalapeno poppers
and enough candy to rot your teeth in one day.

on a side note,
tooting my own horn, of course,
it was my first time making cake balls
and can i just say that they were pretty much incredible.
can i?
can i say that about my own food?
ok good, because i just did.
i'm not even really sure that everyone else
felt the same way.
i just know i did and i'd like to proclaim it.

when michele walked in,
she was flabbergasted.
(i sure am being really descriptive today, huh?)

rita and i were almost sure she knew about it.
but she didn't.
you can't fake tears.
well, at least i know michele can't
and there were indeed tears.

she was so blown away,
that she started nervously hugging everyone.
i'm not a hugger.
at. all.
michele knows this.
she hugged me still.
i think it may have possibly been
our 1st hug ever.
and it was awkward and stiff
and her boobs touched mine.
dear michele,
please don't hug me ever again.
the hussy.

over all,
i think spouse was pleased with our fine work.
dear spouse,
please don't ever ask me
to organize a surprise party ever ever again.
it gives me ulcers.
and i start carrying around
a little green notebook
filled with notes and reminders.
and rita makes fun of me for it.
the hussy.

one of the best parts about the party
was getting to meet
michele's sweet sister, kathy
and her husband joseph.
why is she so awesome, you wonder?

because she likes me more than michele.
mmm hmm.
her blog following past proves it.
she does. i just know it.

the party was super fun.
all the boys gathered in the kitchen
and talked about war and fbi crap.
but i'm pretty sure
they were all thinking something
totally different.

we got rowdy and loud
and played pit.
have you ever played pit?
because you should.
it makes your blood pressure get really high.
and angry.
like trying to tap your hand on the table
as fast as you can
and your hand just can't go quite as fast
as you want it to.
(you're trying it now, aren't you?)

and michele got all awkward hands-y.
she always does.
what in the hell is that?

carl just got angry.
he had enough of all the mormonism
floating in his non-mormon house.
so he grew a mustache,
grabbed a beer,
and went to his office to drop the f bomb.
you go carl.

we took a nice group shot
of all the lovely ladies.
(say that in a dirty mexican accent)
lohvlee laythees.

and then we decided to just be ourselves.
cause we look stoooopid being normal.
normal = not us.
aren't you jealous you don't have friends like mine?
yes you are.

and what good is a party without
a little photo booth friend action?
why do i look mexican next to you?

happy birthday
sweet michele.
thank you for giving us ulcers.
and feeding us fattening fatty foods.
and letting us show your sister
how weird we are.
we had a blast
even though,
we didn't get to be indians.

and thank you for a reason
to wear wax lips
while i partner'd with rita
to make your day amazing.

i hope it worked :)
love you.


Nicole said...

Those thought bubbles cracked me up!!

megan.pross said...

You make me LOL. for real. the hugging/boobage touching part.....HA!

Unknown said...

I loved your bubbles and seeing pics of my family! I have to say I am a bit... ok really jealous of you getting to hang out with such awesome people! I am have even shed a tear of missing all you guys!

Val said...

how fun are y'all.

Anonymous said...

You ladies did such a great job with the decorations!!!

What a fabulous party! :D

jackie said...

that certainly looks like a party. too bad planing gives you ulcers cause it looks pretty rad.

and what?! you're not a hugger? i don't understand your kind. i just don't understand.

zoo keeper said...

My birthday is 9-10-11 you can through me tge indian party.....even though that one looked amazing especially the red lips.

Anonymous said...

Hot ladies! Those lips are like the Octomom! But not creepy in the least. ;0)

Lindsay said...

can someone tell me how the crap Rita still looks amazing with those wax lips being on? like seriously.. not creepy at all.. just gorgeous. you look fine too.. but you ARE kinda creepy. ps.. you KNOW you love being stressed out to throw these kinda parties.

Brandi said...

awwws I lOOOVE her surprise party! :D I saw pics during the longest freakin' day evaaa (seriously it's so long I just realized that while I sent Lady love via facebook I failed via phone, UGH!!).

Love the awkward hug (and btw I don't care that you hate hugs, I always get a sick love for making you feel awkward when I reach out and make you hug me).

BEST awesome surprise bday eva. I am in love, seriously. :)

AND YES so happy you had me there, I'm all smitten with love, but of course how could you not have me there, I'm only awesome.

Happy birthday Lady, I'm so happy you had an awesome day, you old lady.

Brandi said...

.. just read the boy's conversation. hilarious. you are twisted Jessica, and I think I like it.

Anonymous said...

I don't know how you seem to write such simple crap and make it so damn comical. Seriously girl, stop it. STOP! Those thought bubbles were HILARIOUS *deeyuummm!!!*

Happy Birthday to Michele! I'll be there pretty soon! She's only a year younger than me, which blows my mind!

Love you girls! My favorite bloggers!

Shay said...

OH my gosh! I'm so sad to have missed an awesome PARTY!!! I seriously wished I could have been there! Looks and sounds like you all had SO MUCH FUN...LIKE ALWAYS!!! Party on on!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHELE!!!!

amylouwhosews said...

those thought bubbles had my kids asking why i was laughing so hard! I said, because miss Jessica is HI-larious!!!

good times darlin'. worth the ulcers, right?

hokie said...

You girls did such a great job on the party. I'm glad we got to be here for the festivities! Michele has some awesome friends!

Vagabond Mother said...

HAHAHAHA, awesome.

Anonymous said...

Wow, you know how to make a girl laugh, for sure!! lol! Looks like a great surprise party was had by all...