Sunday, August 29, 2010

the first days alone...but not really.

so back track a little,
tuesday evening i had my great pal amy w over.
she took some suh weeeet pics of our family.
i'm going to make pillowcases for each kid
with a picture of them and daddy.
we got all dolled up.
gussy looked incredibly charming.
his sogginess was overflowing.

the day of departure
just so happened to be the first day of school
for all three kids.
emotions were high.
lots of tears.
lots of fighting.
lots of stress.
shoes couldn't be located.
teeth forgot to get brushed.
hair was awry.
we TRIED to do first day of school pics.
but it felt wrong.
there was nothing to be happy about.
the unspoken fate
weighed heavily on ALL our minds.

we walked to the school as a family.
and no one spoke.
tears were fighting.

i felt horrible for sweet miah.
his first day of school
was over shadowed by dad leaving.
kora walked him in the school,
it was super tender.
she was excited about being "in charge" of him.
she even told his teacher
that she would pick him up after school
to walk him home.

thank goodness for awesome friends
who watched my babies all day
so Lover and i could go off gallavanting in wilmington.
we ate, we played, we ate some more.
we cried (well 'i' cried)
we talked.
and we loved :)

when the kids came home from school,
we ordered pizza
and had our last family movie night together
for a long time.
just before bed,
Lover gave all of the kids
a father's blessing.
and me too.
(well, a priesthood one)

they said their goodbyes to daddy
and went to bed.
the spirit has never been more strong in our house
than it was that night.

Lover and i spent a few more hours together
just holding each other.
and then it arrived.
the dreaded hour i had to take him
to the big white buses
that we military wives loathe.

this was our last picture together.
crying red eyes and all.

i didn't stay to watch the buses leave.
i wanted to get out of that sad place
as soon as possible.
i was strong for Lover as we said goodbye.
but as soon as he flashed me the i love you sign
and walked away,
it hit me.
he was gone.
his huge smile did nothing but make me sad
BUT proud
all at the same time.
can you imagine,
living out the greatest dream
you've ever had?
thats what this is like for Lover.
i had to be happy for him.
even if it hurt so bad.

the next morning,
the kids woke up, happy and playful as usual.

except penny.
i had been preparing him the past few days.
telling him that daddy was going bye-bye
for a long time.
and he KNEW, that since daddy was gone,
it had happened.
he was sad.
my penny who doesn't usually cry about anything
was crying about everything.

Lover made the kids a special book before he left.
a recordable book
that plays his voice as each page is turned.
penny fell in love.
as soon as he heard daddy say his name,
he turned to look at me with his big blue eyes,
tongue in cheek,
and smiled.
he now requests his "daddy book" every morning
and every night.

and just to make sure he stayed happy,
i used his birthday money from pops
to buy him a vintage radio flyer tricycle
which he can't get enough of
as he rides around the house in circles
ringing his bell.
and gus likes it too.

i cut gus' hair.
on accident.
i was emotional.
i can't be blamed for my actions
during this emotional state i'm in.
i'm sorry.
i know, it's hideous.
all of his sogginess was strewn all over the carpet.
needless to say,
we're growing it out...
*hides face*

the days are going to be hard.
some harder than others.
sometimes i can't help but dwell on all the things
that he's missing.
like tiny toes that dangle off the stroller
in tiny flippers.
but i know that he is needed where he is.
and i know that not everyone is willing to do the job
that HE is willing to do.
and that makes me smile.

and remember that date with Lover in wilmington?
i hurt my arm.
with a needle that was full of ink.

i love it :)
sorry daddy.


Kathy said...

Thanks to you and your family for the sacrifice you are making and your tattoo is HUGE and AWESOME!!!

Monica said...

I cried reading this post. You are amazing!
My five year old saw Isaak's wife beater pic and said "Oh. That's a cute boy." She likes 'em young.

Chernobyl said...

You are so brave. And I'm not talking about that freaking monstrous tattoo either. Hope we get to see you out here in Texas for that blip in time that you'll be here.

Kaci said...

I'm just a mess reading this post. Bless Austin for what he is doing, but my heart is breaking for your sweet babies. When you get to Rockwall, PLEASE come hang out with us! Kade and Miah will definitely hit it off and Kora can be in "charge" of them!

Anonymous said...

I cried... and then I giggled <3

Super big hugs!!!!

Megan Smith said...

Aww I am crying just reading this! So not looking forward to the day we have to say bye to over here :(.. God bless you my dear! My thoughts and prayers are with your family :(

Staci said...

wow you are a brave woman...i don't know how i could do that esp with 1000 kids either. Your babies are the cutest and I'm sure their smiles will help you wake up in the morning. Ok is that a real tat? hahaha.

amylouwhosews said...

oh! your sore arm! I get it now! Ouch.

I will get you those pics ASAP. Sorry you didn't have them sooner.

Camilla said...

I'm so sorry that there is something that takes your husband away from your family. As trite as it sounds, we are in your debt. But whoa on that tattoo, crazy woman. Did Austin get one to match?

Gina said...

I cried reading this and the post below it. I have never met your family and yet I want to thank all of you for the sacrifices you have made.

I enjoy reading, laughing, crying and seeing just how great and strong you both are in this time.

A Beautiful Life said...

um, your hair looks amazing, go stripper hair! and speaking of hair, guppy ponyo's will grow back, quickly i'm sure ;)
Sigh...FIRST I'm so glad you had that last day together, that is so awesome, and that there were blessings all around, so sweet. I can't believe they make them leave so freakin' late in the night, it probably made it worse. I feel so sad for you, but know us military wives have to always be strong for our men and what they do...I really need to get my kids some pillowcases and books, cuz the constant deploying in our home is getting to them.

I know a lot of people don't agree with tattoos, but I think yours is sentimental, full of love, and done for the right reasons, i think it's super sweet and turned out beautiful.

Hang in there, i'm sure you'll be so busy getting everything ready to move and then once you get home to TExas, you can crash--emotionally, physically, mentally, at least for a day or two. ;) Thank goodness for grandparents! I love you guys, you're in our prayers and I'm here for you, any time of day or lonely wives of the deployed have to stick together ;)

Kimberly Dunn said...

I know we don't know eachother, but holy crap woman! I am bawling my eyes out! You are in my prayers. You are an amazingly strong woman!

Anonymous said...

is that a real tattoo????

nicole said...

awww, ok, i read alot, but i don't really comment much. (bad me, i know. what can i say, i'm a woman of few words. lol)
but i just wanna say how you made me cry!! awww, i'm fighting back more tears right now!!
i'm 14 weeks pregnant with our daughter, and my hubby is leaving in 9 weeks too =(
i have to ask, and i know you're probably not doing well right now, so if you don't get back to me right away, that's ok. where did you guys find the book for your kids? we would love to get something like that for our son. he's loving the books that read to him right now. we got him a marine corps build a bear last deployment, and he loves it. a book would be amazing.

Erica said...

Need to leave you some love here too...

Everthing about this post was fabulous! Your honesty, heatbreak, adorable children, and that wicked tattoo!!!

Hugs, best wishes, and prayers for you and your family. I cannot wait for your reunion post. Now THAT will be something beyond fabulous!

Missy said...

What a great idea the book was! Be sure to take a pic of it when he returns. I'm sure it will be more than tattered by then.

TanyatheMom said...

I read all of the time, but I never comment. My prayers, thoughts, and lots of hugs go out to you and the babies. I am so grateful for the sacrifices you are all making. You freakin' ROCK that tattoo! I LOVE it! It's perfect :-). Time is going to fly by here in the sweltering land of Tejas, and you will be reunited with your Lover. Hope we get to see you while you're here.

TRES said...

I only met you briefly in person but it was obvious that you have a BIG and WONDERFUL HEART. I am sorry that your heart had to make room for this kind of sadness. I will be thinking of you, your family and praying for a safe return of your Lover. If there is anything a desperate housewife in Wyoming can do, let me know!

The Nugen's said...

THANK YOU FOR THE SACRIFICE YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ARE MAKING FOR MY FAMILY. I admire your strength. Your tat is AWESOME! Hope we can have bunches of playdates (for the kids and us) while you are back home is TEXAS!!!

Charity said...

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of your family and are praying that Austin stays safe and that this separation will go by very quickly. I can't imagine having to go through this and I think it is fabulous that you can still be so strong and proud of him for what he is doing. My heart pours for the kiddos and I love that book. They are a blessing and together you will get through this time.

Charity said...

This post has me crying, my thoughts and prayers are with your entire family here and far.

Summer said...

I cried, I laughed. Oh girl! Love your blog and your new tattoo.

Betsy said...

I was unaware I was going to be so MUSHY. Darn you for making me cry. Lover will be in my prayers - you and the chit-lins too. It'll be hard, but then he'll come home and you'll have another set of hands to chase after Penny and Gussy, and all new stories and lots of LOVE. And not the kind that can go through the mail *wink wink*. Enjoy "home" and family and LIFE.

Heidi said...

How could any Mom or anyone for that matter not cry through that post....good luck Jessica....!!

Justine said...

This is such a sad and sweet post. I love your new tattoo.

Just Better Together

Jennifer Haas said...

What an awesome family you guys are. I was reading the beginning of your post and relating to you, with all the back to school stuff, and then I read on.... I wish you and your family the best of luck and I hope the time goes by so quickly and smoothly while daddy is gone!!!

I found your sight from SITS, the title caught my eye. I am a new follower too!!

Unknown said...

What a beautiful family you have, goes perfectly with your tattoo! I come from a military family too, so I can relate to the mixed emotions of sadness and pride that go along with having your loved one away from home. Best of luck to you all!

Carolina said...

awwww. this post seriously brought the tears. the tattoo is the hotness.
i love you.
I know you have a lot of people here, but if you ever need ANYTHING while you're here, don't hesitate to call or let me know.
I mean it!!

Brittany@Love Stitched said...

I'm a secret reader...the kind who lurks in the shadows and never comments LOL but THIS post warranted a voice.

Your "lover" is so brave and strong and we thank him for all that he does

YOU and your FAMILY are even stronger to deal with the goodbyes and daily loss of your LOVER.

AND hello to the awesome tattoo...I LOVE It and the meaning behind it! You are even MORE brave for getting it...I have a tiny star on my ankle and it HURT soooo bad I can't imagine how that felt :-/

Anyway...i'm coming out of my shadow and saying HELLO :)

Anonymous said...

I'm a lurker too, but I had to comment this time. Your post brought tears. Thank you for sharing your family with us, and thank you for the sacrifice your husband, and family, is making.

Paige said...

Sad. I know all too well these feelings.

Minus the ink needle feelings. :) You're totally crazy, girl. But I'm glad you openly embrace it!! ha!

Good luck with everything. You're a tough cookie so I know it'll be OK. :)

Vagabond Mother said...

I've been thinking a lot about your little(big) family. You are a tough girl. Thanks for getting a tattoo so I can think about that even more than the fact that your husband is off to the boonies. What a rockstar!!!

No Model Lady said...

Boo for sadness, yay for you supporting Lover while he pursues his life's goals!!

PS-Does your arm feel better yet? Some people can't handle tattoo pain. I took mine like a man. (If men grunt and hum like they're in labor.)

Lindsay said...

welp.. there it is.. lover is gone... but lover taTTOO is here forever. i wish you had told me those stinkin' stars were for your TAT.. i would have known how to make them look a LOT better!!! damn you sister!!! whatevs. i miss austin now.

Brandi said...

I have been so busy working and ignoring everyone and everything other then my own heart that I am just seeing this Jessica. You got me crying like a damn baby. not. even. kidding.

The chillin's look amazing on their first day even if wet with tears. Lover looked hot next to you and your hotness ... even with red eyes. : p

AND THAT TATTOO is hot!! Love love love the stars.

I miss you sunshine!

Suzanne said...

That was soooo sweet. You have such an adorable family. We love Austin and we love you!

Unknown said...

I hardly ever comment on blogs anymore (there's just not enough time in the day), but this warranted a comment.

You guys are so awesome, you're so brave, and I really admire what you're doing. I know it's going to be hard while he's gone, but you have TONS of people who love you, and absence does make the heart grow fonder, right?!

Jerad doesn't believe your tattoo is real. I was like, um, you don't know Jessica very well. ;)

E said...

Oh watching that white bus pull up is the worse!! I know what your going thru and how hard it is. Except we don't have kids.... I couldn't imagine how much harder that must be! Hang in there, I promise it will get easier. Stay busy. Thats my best advice.

PS I love your banner picture!! :) And the tattoo rocks!

Tracie Nall said...

I can't even imagine how hard that day was for all of you.

I will be thinking about your family and praying for him.

The tattoo?? Awesome!! I love it!

sweet southern inspiration said...

absolutely wonderful blog. love your writing, love your story and will be praying for your husbands safe return to all of you who clearly love him so much.

Daisy @ 3pinkdrinks said...

I really admire what you and your family are doing. I don't think I could be as brave. My BFF is on the tail-end of her sweetheart's 9 month deployment... It hasn't been easy.

Stopping by from SITS... Love your blog and content style, and your arm art. :o)

eHugs. You should pour a pink drink.

Amy DM said...

Oh, my goodness. It's too early in the morning for tears....
I'll be praying for you as I follow your story from now on.

Unknown said...

Just a beautiful post from a wonderful wife and mother! So glad I found you through SITS today! Will be praying for "Lover" as he is deployed.

Unknown said...

This is so sweet. I cried as I read it. I'm going through deployment too. A little over a month into it. :( From one military wife to another, stay strong!!

Happy SITS day!

Donna said...

So sad! We're posted in Amman, Jordan, as a family, and there are a few families here who sent the dad to Iraq or A-stan while they stay here. It doesn't look easy. Stay strong.

CK said...

Mmm well, this post hits a little close to home. My husband is gone to Afghan as well... We are almost to our hump day and I'll be glad for it, too!
Your family is adorable! I am glad you had friends to watch the babies.
Happy day, sitstah!
-CK said...

Sent here from SITS and writing thru tears... hoping that each day passes quickly and reunion is closer than you think!

TuTu's Bliss said...

I have to say that I am impressed that you're holding it together so well. Give me your secret.This is hubby's third deployment and I still haven't found my grove. This one hit harder. I think I overestimated myself since I did it twice already. I have to admit I cried during the pledge of allegiance at my daughter's school. I couldn't believe it. I didn't even cry when bambi's mom got shot and here I am crying at the pledge of allegiance. I think I need a t-shirt because the other mommies think I'm just crazy. Anyways....

Carol E Wyer said...

I have a huge lump in my throat as i read this. My Father was in the Army for over thirty years and my Mother and I were in pieces every time he went away so I can empathise with your situation. Harder on the wife as she has to hold it all together.You have a beautiful family and a great attitude. xx

Jenni said...

You rock momma. You and your lover are both strong. And love the tattoo. =)

Allyson & Jere said...

This made me cry. You wrote it all so well. And my heart just broke for ALL of you! I don't know how you (or all military wives) do it. Hang in there, I hope that the time will fly by for you.

And all I can say about that tatoo is, ummm wow! It's HUGE! That's got to be fun in church. haha

No Longer 25 said...

Happy SITS day to you! I hope you get lots of support from your fellow SITStahs today.

It's great to read this, thanks for sharing your experience and how you feel.

One of my closest friend's husbands just left for Afghanistan this week. It's the first time he's been away after all his training. I can't imagine how she's going to feel and I'm not really sure what we can do to help her. It's so difficult to imagine what it feels like for her, reading your post has helped me understand a bit though.

How do you get through it? Talking lots with friends and distractions? I really want to be there for her but I'm not sure how to help.

Have a lovely day,

Unknown said...

Agh... you are breaking my heart... bless you & your family (lover) for all you sacrifice for the rest of us....

SimplySandi said...

Bless your heart! Thanks for sharing - I feel like I was right there with you. You have a lovely family!

alyson: Common Sense, Dancing said...

LOVE the tat. Awesome.

Spent our annual summer vacay at Topsail Island in early Aug. Had I known you were around we could've hooked up... :)

Thank YOU for all you do -- can't imagine being a military spouse. My brother is USMC as of June now in Okinawa with his pregnant wife and two baby girls. I know Marines are tough, but jeez their wives (husbands) are tougher, I think!!

Anonymous said...

You know those times when you visit a fave blogger and then click a link, which leads you to another, and then another? That's what happened to me today. I can't recall the crazy path I took, but it brought me here.

I love how you write in bold words and broken sentences, it's so nontraditional, and yet so fulfilling. I've never before visited a site, and after one visit, immediately placed it on my blogroll. Until today.

You rock.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

Thank you for the sacrifices that you and your husband make for our country. Please know that I will be keeping your husband and your family in my prayers. I'm hoping that your tears of sadness are quickly replaced with tears of joy when he returns. It's so nice to meet you from SITS, and I'm a new follower!

LisaDay said...

There are no shortage of things to comment about but I will just say that is a beautiful post.

Happy SITS day.


Spring M Fricks said...

I'm here from Sits.

What a sacrifice. Having family members in the military, I know how hard it is and how proud we are. I pray your family stays strong throughout his deployment and that he returns safely into your arms.

Susie said...

Thank you so much for your husband's service! I hope that your SITs day will help ease the pain of your sacrafice just a little bit:-)

Beth Zimmerman said...

So sweet and sad! Thank you again! Your family is BEAUTIFUL! I'll be praying for all of you!

Unknown said...

Bless your heart and your family.
I'm so sad for you. I know this is no consolation...but we love and appreciate you and your sacrifice. It still sucks and I am NOT a believer in sending our men over there and separating families for no purpose.

Your blog is awesome. I will be checking in on you from time to time. Hang in there. You are loved and will be prayed for.

Stopping by from sits.

MommyLovesStilettos said...


Very very awesome tattoo!

AndreaLeigh said...

I can't imagine how hard this must be. My husband is a submariner in the US Navy. He deploys regularly, several times per year, but for short periods of time (3 months). It's a whole different ball of wax than your situation, I know. I am thinking of you and praying for your husband.

Krista@RustikChic said...

I so love the love you have for your husband. I too married my high school sweetheart and am still head over hills crazy for him, like you are. This was so heartbreaking to read (even though you still managed to make me laugh!) as I can't imagine how hard it must be for you and your kiddos. You are very brave and supportive. You have a special sweet little family and I love reading your posts. Sending thoughts and love your way.:) PS I LOVE the new ink!

Anonymous said...

So sweet. A friend of mine spent a 7 month tour in Afghanistan last year, it wasn't fun and he's just my friend not my lover and baby-daddy... sending you the love! Is that your first tatoo? Beautiful, but an impressive undertaking for your first one (I'm guessing - I'm not inked so maybe once you get started it's no big deal to keep going? Curious.) Anyway, I'll stop rambling and just wish you a happy SITS day!

Anonymous said...

So sweet. A friend of mine spent a 7 month tour in Afghanistan last year, it wasn't fun and he's just my friend not my lover and baby-daddy... sending you the love! Is that your first tatoo? Beautiful, but an impressive undertaking for your first one (I'm guessing - I'm not inked so maybe once you get started it's no big deal to keep going? Curious.) Anyway, I'll stop rambling and just wish you a happy SITS day!

Chelsea said...

Congrats on your big day!! You have such a beautiful family, I just want to give little Gus a big hug, what a little cutie he is!!! I can't imagine what you're going through but I can tell you are an incredibly strong person and you WILL get through this. I will say a special prayer just for you and yours. Hope you can enjoy your labor day weekend.

P.S. Love the tat!

mypixieblog said...

My heart aches for you, but I'm glad that you are surrounded by so much love during this emotional time. Hopefully the months will go by quickly and you'll be reunited with your lover before you know it. Stay strong. You have a wonderful disposition and I can't wait to follow your journey.

Best wishes always and I looooove the ink :)

Trish said...

I just treared up at work reading your post{not cool I tell ya!}
I found you through SITS and I am hooked! I live about 45 mins away from if you ever need to retreat, I'm your girl!
My heart breaks for you and your family. I hope you will be strong and that the next 7 months pass by quickly for you and you will soon have him back in your arms again.
Love your new tat! How fitting!!!
Feel free to drop by and say hello!

Mommyof2girlz/StephD said...

Oh the tears started early this morning, sorry to read your hubby deployed. You have a beautiful family and I know the next months will be tough but your a Marine wife *Oorah*...we can make it through anything. Toughest job in the Corps right? LOVE the tatt and brave girl. I've always heard that part is one of the most sensitive, I have a few myself, but too chicken to have one there yet. Stay strong sweetie :)

CoconutPalmDesigns said...

Wow! You weren't kidding about crying my eyes out! Your family is gorgeous. Bless you and your family!

Happy SITS Day!

Cheers :-)
- CoconutPalmDesigns

Sarah C. said...

Love the tat! I can't imagine how tough it is to have your hubs gone for so long. Breaks my heart! Military families are amazing! Big hugs to you and your kiddos!

Happy SITSday!

Shileen @ The Wonder Woman Challenge said...

Hi there! Just stopping by from SITS. What a beautiful post ... really! Yes, I did and am crying. I am not a tatoo girl myself ... but I love your tatoo! How incredibly special!! God bless you and your dear family!! I thank your husband for serving and I thank you for supporting him in his service. You give up a lot for what he does ... for our freedom. Thank you for the part that you play in securing our freedom! Many, many blessings!!

Losing Brownies said...

I cried so hard reading this. I have so much respect for military wives. You sacrifice so much so that your husband can continue to protect our country. Thank you.

Mimi N said...

Your husband is my hero! I'm proud of you to have married a man who serves his country!

As for your Tat, that's AWESOME! I plan on getting one someday. My 17yo DD got one for her 17th bday this year and it's beautiful. I was thinking of making an anklet on each leg made out of my kids' names.

Praying that your husband is covered with heavenly protection during his time overseas and that you are reuinited quicker than you thought possible!

~Mimi from SITS

theUngourmet said...

Found you through SITS today. What a sweet and loving family you have. The close bond you all share is precious and wonderful! May God give you and your family strength to get through each day until your husband returns.

Your blog is terrific! ;)

Helen Hanson said...

You all have lovely game-faces. I come from a military line, and it's never fun waiting, but you've approached it with style and grace. May it pass quickly. All the best to you and your family!

Untypically Jia said...

Breaking my heart. *BIG HUGS* I can only imagine what kind of trouble you're going to get into while he's deployed. You should make a running list of "things I did that I probably shouldn't have cause I had no supervision" and then send it to him. It'll be good for a laugh I imagine.

By the way, that tattoo is beyond awesome. ♥♥♥

Unknown said...

What an emotional post! Thanks for sharing that with us!!

"Cottage By The Sea" said...

Congratulations on your SITS day. I hope it helps your heart to be a little lighter at such a hard time for you and your family. Beyond the emotions you must endure, seeing your children go through them too must be even harder. I want to thank you, and your Lover for the service to the greatest country on earth! Freedom is never free, and it's people like you who help make us the Land of the Free. God Bless, and now I'm off to peruse the rest of your blog.

AP Mommy said...

Wow! Thank you for your service and what a sevice you have - that's a lot of kids to take care of all on your own! My husband is being deployed for 6 weeks and I only have 1 (+ another growing inside) and I'm a bit nervous. :-# I hope that they all do well with him being gone, as well as you. You'll all be in my prayers.

Stopping by from SITS

LBDDiaries said...

When I'm done smiling & tearing up, I'll probably post a better comment but wow. Just wow. I will add the Lowes to our morning prayer time & ask angels to surround and protect Lover wherever he goes (and his family!). God will bring him back safely - believe that. He offers perfect protection!

Tammy said...

I don't even know you and I want to cry...I could feel exactly how you felt reading your post.

...oh and I wanted to cry for all that pain you must of felt on your arm! ;)

Malanda @ Outnumbered by Little Boys! said...

God bless you and your family for all the sacrifices yall make for our country! Hang in there it's not goodbye it's see ya later! :)

P.S. Your children ARE adorable!

Unknown said...

I am so deeply sorry for this pain you must be feeling. I can not even imagine. I prayed for you as I was reading this. Prayed and prayed.

I pray he will return home safely and you can hold him once again.

LOVE your pretty blog. So special.

MommyToTwoBoys said...

I hope the time flies by! Every day love those babies and concentrate on them and their sweetness, it will help get you through. My husband was gone all the time when he was active duty and that first day is torture. But each day after gets a little better...kind of...

Anonymous said...

Something told me not to read this post, till I came home from my appointment. (wipes tears away) Oh well.

You have a lovely blog and an even lovelier family. Your family is to be admired for your sacrifices. Will be reading here often.

Happy SITS Day!

Snarky Belle said...

I was sent your way by a dear friend of mine. She always knows how to turn me into a big, bawling baby.
I can barely see through my tears right now. I'm so glad she sent me this link. Your family is so beautiful.

My husband recently returned from a 9 month deployment to Iraq. So, I've been needing a special military family to fill the void in my prayers now & here you are. We pray for all soldiers every day, but you know, it's nice to have a specific family.

So, I don't know you, but much love to you and yours. And thank you for your sacrifice. I get it.

Katie said...

Oh hon, I can't imagine what you're going through!! Sending lots of prayers and hugs your way! I hope the days of transition get easier and easier, and even though you may be a single mom for a while, I hope you never feel alone! I love that he gave them (and you!) a blessing before he left. So sweet!!

Amy said...

Oh my goodness...thank you for your and your husband's sacrifice! What an example you are. I hope that you are filled with peace through this time. I love that he gave your children and you a blessing before he went. How special. And that sweet book. Bless you!

btw...Happy SITS Day! :)

North of 25A said...

Sometimes words just fail. I will say a simple, but heartfelt thank you and wish you a good SITS day; and I'll be back.

Mama Up! said...

Tough stuff, especially for the kids. A lot to handle at once, too. I sympathize... my brother is in OK now, but he may be deployed to who knows where at any time. Stay strong!

Susie Kline said...

After reading this I need to be extra special nice to my husband tonight!

Thank you for sharing!
xo Susie

MommaKiss said...

beautiful beautiful post. your family is gorgeous and that tat is awesome. "sorry dad" - sigh.

Estell said...

This is so emotional. I wish I was as strong as you are! heh I actually work at hallmark and we have though's record-able books you know and that is the cutest story Ive heard for them :] Your family is so cute! <3

kt moxie said...

Beautiful post. Lovely, brave kids. You are a talented writer.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I found you through SITS, and you are making me cry! Thank you and your family for your sacrifices...

Nicole @

Carrie said...

Not sure what I can say that hasn't already been said.

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Can't wait to see where this road leads for all of you... what a beautiful family!

{and yes, stopping over from SITS, I love that they featured you!}

Garrett Gee said...

I really enjoyed this post. You have an amazing family. Thanks for sharing your story.

Unknown said...

I have so many friends with husbands, fiances, boyfriends, etc. deployed and I give you all so much credit for how brave you are during all of this.

And LOVE the tattoo. What a great way to honor the ones that you love.

Candace said...

I'm behind on your blog. Sorry.

This post made me cry, of course. I held it together until I saw the last picture of you and A. I could see in your eyes how much you'd been crying and that breaks my heart for you!!!

Each day is one day closer.

Love you.

Unknown said...

I love it! Thanks for brightening the mood after this tear jerker. Whew! Tissue, please!

Lindsey from The R House said...


Brittany said...

GREAT POST, cried my eyes out.
OH! And I LOVE your tattoo!!!

Amy said...

My heart aches for your family, because personally, I know how much it hurts to say goodbye (especially to the big white bus... ugh). But I am so amazed and proud by how strong you are and your writing is amazing. You're all in my heart & mind and I'll keep checking in!

Unknown said...

Man I didn't think I could feel that massive knot in the sinking pit of my stomach again, but I feel it for you. My husband retired after 22 years in the US Navy, I never stood around to watch the ship leave either. I'd just drive up and drop him off.

Anonymous said...

This is a great post.

I'm stopping by from SITS.

Unknown said...

Thanks for making me cry at work. Good luck and virtual hugs.

Nickie said...

I came over from lovestitched.....U made me cry. Be brave Lover will be home soon :) Great Blog!

Ashley {hudson's happenings} said...

*wiping tears off my computer screen.*

This post is heartbreaking and heartwarming all in one. I'm so glad I found your blog (I'm a new follower). A big thankyou to your husband for sacrificing his precious family time and his life to guard our freedom. And you better believe I'll be thinking about you & those 5 beautiful kids while he's gone.