Monday, June 21, 2010

guest blogger - little miss momma.

while i rumage through roadkill to try to pick a winner...
ok. so i've already raved about this little gem once,
but i'm gonna do it again.
i asked:
ashley *lynn* (giggle)
if she would be so kind as to guest blog for me,
and guess what?
she agreed.
aren't we lucky?
but before we start,
can i just point out my favorite things about her?
i love lists,
let's do a list.
1. she's petite. i always wished i was petite so i could wear super high heels and still not be taller than anyone.
2. she has a face you just wanna bite off it's so adorable. when i first saw her at the cbc i wanted to be her friend immedietly. ya know, cuz i'm only friends with pretty people.
4. she's lds. and mormons are super cool. ahem. if you're not one, you should look into it *wink*
5. her blog feels cozy. like you wish you had a big pink recliner to sit in while you read it. i love how she uses her blog to reach a wide spectrum of angles. this is one of my favorite posts of hers thus far.
6. she's crafty. and believe it or not, i was crafty at one time. long long ago, in a land called "beforeihadfivekidsandtherewassuchathingassparetime".
7. she's a california girl and i may very well be one of those in the near future. you just never know!
8. she's a first time time mom with just one little bundle of love and her posts make me REnotice the things i should be thankful for instead of stress about or overlook. sometimes when you're a mom of five, you tend to forget those things.
9. she always has some uh-maze-ing giveaways on her blog. seriously, like the best most cutest stuff ever. eva eva eva eva.
10. she likes me back. which is rare. wait, she likes me "as well". she doesn't like my back. well, she might. i don't know if she's ever seen my back or really paid attention to it. if not, it's quite jlowe-ish. so she may very well like it if she were to see it. who knows.
enjoy ashley!
{Lil W 8 months old}

I have officially been a momma for 8 months and 1 week (unless you count preggo time--in which case I have been a momma for 17 months and 1 week). And in that time I have learned a few tidbits that would have been nice to know before I started this whole parenting business--little helpful hints that could have made my life, oh, so much easier... little words of wisdom that would have saved me countless hours of worry... little life lessons that, had I of known before, would have made me a wiser and calmer momma over these last 8 months and 1 week.

So...through my journey of mommy-hood I thought why not share some of these unexpected experiences:

1. You will NOT have your pre-baby body back after 6 months (unless you are super woman, in which case you should stop reading this entire post because nothing will apply to you). After Lil W was born I went to my 6 week OB check-up expecting to receive the "go ahead" to begin exercising again. I remember my disappointment when my doctor postponed physical activity for another 6 weeks. So you would think that I would be rearing to go as soon as those 6 weeks were up--well you would be wrong. Instead, every day turned into "I'll start working out tomorrow"--and that mentality has continued through to today (8 months and 1 week later).

2. Don't let anyone tell you that you won't need a SUV until you have at least three kids. I have one small 17 pound baby and I feel like a U-Haul would be the most appropriate method of transportation to house all of the necessary "gear" I need just to run to the grocery store two blocks away. Diapers, wipes, bottles, a binkie, an extra binkie, toys, snacks, blanket, changing pad, car seat, stroller, extra change of clothes, baby bjorn, hand sanitizer, and yes, another extra binkie. I suppose my baby wouldn't starve if I forgot the extra bottle or snacks just once--after all, my hubby manages just fine when he takes Lil W out and about with nothing but a car seat {*love you hun*}.

3. Your house will never resemble the "perfect order" it did pre-baby, and the sooner you accept that the more sane you will feel. If you stepped into my home today, you would think that you were in the home of Octomom. Every once empty ounce of floor space is now filled with some baby contraption I never knew existed a year ago. The bouncer and jumper have taken the place of the new end tables you wanted and the pack n'play has replaced the ottoman you were planning to buy--and this is your new reality, and it doesn't even bother you.

4. How you look when you leave the house is no longer a top priority--in fact, not really a priority at all. Instead, your new priority is making sure you Lil One is dressed to impress. *Embarrassing Confession Alert*: Some days I dress Lil W in his cutest little get up and take him to our local Costco just so I can smile as he receives compliments--I don't need to buy anything, I just go to be a proud momma and show off my well-dressed baby {how sad is that}. Meanwhile I have greasy hair, spit up stains on my shoulder, cheerios stuck to my bum and the same outfit I wore the day before.

5. You will never eat breakfast again. Apparently this is the period of the day when your new Lil One requires the MOST attention (bathing, feeding, dressing, poo diaper changing, entertaining after a good nights rest, going on a walk, etc). The closest thing I have ever experienced to breakfast is the last of the pureed bananas and rice cereal I fed Lil W. And yes, I have sadly acquired a taste for rice cereal--I'm serious.

6. Strangers will touch your baby. I know this, because before I had Lil W, I was one of those touchy strangers--I just couldn't resist. I didn't realize that my potential stranger germs were giving the new mommy a panic attack. And nowI receive my pay back every day as complete strangers kiss my baby's hands and let him put their fingers in his mouth, ick!

7. Speaking of strangers, as soon as you have a new baby you WILL be insulted by complete strangers. I remember the very first time the hubby and I took Baby W out in public. Lil W was 8 weeks old and the hubby and I hadn't left the house since we brought him home. We were desperate for a taste of the real world, not to mention we needed to restock our fridge--so we took a trip to the grocery store. We were so worried to take our little bundle of joy out in public that we loaded up on antibacterial gel and covered his car seat with a blankie so no one could touch him. Once inside the store, we were approached by a woman and her young children. She asked how old our baby was and when we told her he was 8 weeks she gave us a mini-lecture about how "she couldn't believe we would bring him to the store at such a young age--she never would have done that with her kids". My jaw hit the floor and my eyes filled with tears as she made me feel like the worst mom in the world. Lesson learned that day: let it go--because it will happen again, because even strangers will have an opinion about how you should raise your children.

8. And the last tid bit for today--There is such a thing as feeding your baby too many carrots. And yes its true, your baby will turn orange when you feed them too many carrots. And then your pediatrician will point this out and politely tell you to widen the range of foods you are feeding him. And because you are learning to "let it go" you won't freak out that you have an orange baby, instead you will go home and feed him some green beans.
Thats all the tidbits for now, more to come later!


okay, so are you in love yet?

because if not, yur cray-see (nacho libre accent)

go visit ashley and let her know i sent ya!

you'll wanna add her to your list of fabulous blogs to follow, trust me.


ashley @ little miss momma said...

Umm, this girl is awesome--like I want to be her best friend kinda awesome, lol!

No but seriosuly, this feature rocks and thank you for the crush you have on me--the feeling is mutual!

And i love your back--I mean I love you back! But from the spray tan video I watched, your back aint half bad either!

Paige said...

Ok, #4 is so me. I pretty much forget what I look like when I'm going out the door. As long as my kids look OK, then I'm good to go. When they're not around is when I start to notice the spit up stains, cheerios, no make-up, and same clothes. Oh, and as for not taking your babe out till 8 weeks or more, HA! I took mine out at least around 3 weeks (or less) AND he was a preemie. I got my own lectures from strangers. Fortunatey I didn't care what they said.

dena said...

not so rare...i like you back too. AND your back...

p.s. i deleted one of my ...s, so as to not add to emotional turmoil.

Bonnie said...

That last one is so true. My little Emma was completely orange, her nose matched her hair. AND since the red hair was kind of random I was convinced for the longest time that it was only orange because of all the carrots. After all, if her nose was orange from carrots, why couldn't her hair be.... but alas, the orange nose is gone but the hair has remained steadily carroty.

Lexie Loo, Lily, Liam & Dylan Too said...

LOL, this list is RIGHT ON!

The Chaplins said...

i love this and can't wait to send it to my preggo friends :)

Vera said...

I love you blog. I left something for you at my blog here:

zoo keeper said...

i so love her also and i had know idea it was because of our bond of feeding our first babies to many of the year "I" say!

em said...

This is why I love blogging: I don't know you in real life, but I found you via my college bestie (Andi). I don't know Little Miss Momma in real life, but her hub and my hub grew up together in Chey-town, WY. Their families are good friends.

I'm a stalker and proud of it, because it shows me just how small the world is these days :)

PS: I LOVE your blog, Hussy. You slay me.