Thursday, May 1, 2008

Chicken Peacock

I found out yesterday that Jamie Lynn Spears has the same due date as I do. Have you seen pictures of her pregnant? They don't exist because she doesn't LOOK pregnant and she's the same as me. Whatever! I guess I should take into consideration she's like 12 (not really) and has never had a baby. While I was googling "Pregnant Jamie Lynn" this picture popped up. I liked it so I stole it to show you :) It's me with blonde hair except my boobs extend up under my armpits and I have nipples :)
While looking through the mail yesterday I found a letter to myself from my mother. Yes, she mailed it with a stamp and all even though she could have just handed it to me. I took a picture of the front because it's so cute! She just sent it to cheer me up because she knows how sad I've been feeling lately being locked up in my cave with the door shut so no one can hear or see me crying my eyes out. Speaking of being sad...I like most all of Carrie Underwood's songs but lately I've been playing "So Small" to make me cry some more. It feels good to get it out and the words make me feel better. About the mountain I'm climbing is really just a grain of sand and that Love is all that matters and when you figure that out, everything else seems so small. It's true. This will be over before we know it. I talked to Austin on the phone last night and I felt so sad for him. He has the worst "room" if that's what you wanna call it. Some how everyone else got real dorm like rooms and he got a storage shed transformed into a "room" because they ran out or regular rooms. He only has a spring bed, no chair, or desk, no windows or fridge or anything. He hates it. He was upset yesterday because they let everyone out early and most of the guys went home to their families or to their nice rooms and he didn't have anything to go home to. I know it's hard for me here, but at least I have parts of our family with me to keep me happy and I just think of how he has nothing there. He can't even check the internet to see pictures or read my blog :( I just miss him so much and I think he really needs a hug but I'm not there to give him one. I hope things get better for him soon and once they weed out most of the guys he'll be upgraded to a better room. I just keep praying for him that he will be able to stay focused on his job there and not worry about us too much. I know he does and I don't want to make things worse for him by being whiney and blah every time I talk to him.

Kora has been letting her hair grow out and last night when I had my hair up like this, she brought me a hair band to do the same to hers. It was the first time in a LONG time she's been able to put all of it up in ONE big piggy. She was so proud and when she looked in the mirror she said, "WOW! I look JUST like you mom!" It made my heart smile. I never imagined there would be anyone who wanted to look just like me. Especially right now, but hearing Kora say that with the utmost excitement made me feel better about myself. She sees past all my flaws that I like to point out.


Lindsay said...

that's so tender... all of it.. but especially the part about Kora wanting to be just like you. Makes me want to grow something inside me.

Lindsay said...

how did i read this post without commenting about the barbie? that IS you!... how strange.

Jess said...

Aw...I hope the time apart goes by quickly. You are so much stronger than you think...I'm so proud of the sacrifice you are making for now knowing it will all be worth it in the end!

Kora so knows she cute! Look at that smirk!

Amanda said...

That barbie scares me! And Kora's hair looks adorable!!!!!!

Vagabond Mother said...

It would be nice if your baby was open to the world like that, then we could see it. Especially if we didn't have to see your nipples.

I feel bad for Austin, really bad. I feel bad for you too. You guys are the best friends I've never met.

Kora looks so sassy. No one wants to look like me, or else I'd be worried about them.

Lindsay said...

where's your F-ing post for today... too BUSY to post every single moment of every single day? now you know how i feel. brat.

a hug. (HAHA)

Tara said...

That barbie is crazy, I have never seen anything like it! It's cool, like it should seriously be on display.
The only good thing about Austin's situation is that he is there first, instead of getting a good room and THEN being forced to the shed. At least he will appreciate the "good room" so incredibly when he is upgraded, that it might actually help him feel a tiny bit better? And then he can sock all the idiots who think they have a right to complain about their dorm rooms, since they don't know any different, stupid guys. Poor Austin, it just sucks all around. I feel SO SO sad for him! I hope it goes by fast.

Love your chicken with pretty feathers, and Kora is always gorgeous, only because she has such a GORGEOUS mother!

Amy Herfurth said...

It just makes sense to have the same due date as Jamie Lyn because your my sister and I was due around the same time as Britney's first baby.