whats on jessica's phone.

oh dear,

sweet sweet Lover.

you are not here to threaten me

about what i can or cannot put on my blog.

and your swing pictures

were just too good to pass up.

here's a small swinging sequence.

enjoy!

Lover likes to swing on the playground swings.

he swings high

and lowE,

pumping his little leggies

back and forth

in the wind.

but sometimes Lover gets cRaZy.

and swings side to side

making scary faces

because he knows i'm taking pictures.

and then he realizes

that maybe that wasn't the best idea

because his wife is a blogger,

who loves to document whats on her phone.

so he jumps off the swing

to try and erase the pictures.

but he is unsuccessful.

i love you Lover.

especially because you're nerdy like me.

i found this perfect

box-o-terds

at the commissary one day.

i decided they would be perfect

for leaving on someone's doorstep

when they're naughty.

i can think of a few people

who need a box-o-terds right now!

brothers watching tv.

and being special.

mmm.
my yummy grub from the px in q-town.

yes, this picture is in a stall.
and i'm on the other end.
but that isn't what this is about.
this is about isaak's eye
which is obviously swollen.
and on this particular day,
i had taken him to the naval hospital
(note the bracelet)
because it was the SAME eye
that had the random bulls eye mark
which started out swollen,
exactly like it was AGAIN this day.
but,
i was told that there was no difference
between the eyes
when compared.
and that it was NOT swollen.
and i should just go home.
hmm.
just another reason to be happy about my move.


can i just borrow a little girl
to wear this cardigan?
my two loves.
cardigans + peacocks.


i think is why they keep the "cold" slaw
in the cold section.

craaaaaaazy 'ole emma.

real men swim in the ocean

in their cammies.

michele was recently caught

wearing two colors of flippers

at a small party rita threw.

i guess going to school

and gettin a big time degree

doesn't mean

you can match your clothes properly.

see.

i knew school was for nerds.

i miss soggy gussy :(

being able to deposit checks

from my phone

has allowed me to avoid going into banks.

but one day, i needed to get some cash

and apparently, it's the 21st century now.

wtc?

when did this happen?

computer screen tellers?

i felt like i was on the jetsons or something.

one day i had a good hair day.

(one day)

so i sent a picture to some of my friends

to document the lusciousness of my stripper hair.

and i got a reply from bonnie

saying that my eyebrows

were too scary and pointy

and they say,

"i want to eat your baby."

so i sent her a new picture

with less pointy eyebrows.

i really do cater to all.

glad i drink redbull

cuz i don't have that kinda cash.

and i have about

4, 752 hours over the next 7 months

that i need mega energy.

on our trip to q-town before Lover left

i had to take over driving for a bit.

shhh.

don't tell.

Lover likes for people to think

he drives all the way, all the time.

but even Lovers

need to rest their little heads too.

after his power nap,

he was up and ready for hotness.

please note my favorite part of his smiley face.

and as cute as he can be,

do not be fooled.

Lovers can act a fool too.

shooooooot.

limby high chairs.

this is how i felt most of my school years.

tall and limby and awkward.
i almost hugged one of these chairs

because i know

exactly how uncomfortable they feel.

Lover likes sweet potatoes.

he especially likes the skin.

he asked me to take a picture of this potato skin

because it does NOT remind him

of anything inappropriate.

it does NOT have a tiny root

growing from the side of it

that could possibly be mistaken for a wirey hair.
and Lover is NOT laughing uncontrollably

like a school boy

as he holds this skin erect.

it is JUST a sweet potato skin.

that is all.

prettiest. boy. ever.

period.

(yes, he is the front seat

and no, the car is not moving. chill.)

sleeping hawcees on the porch.

courtesy of penny guy.

brothers in a grocery cart.

gettin "ooh's and ahh's" from every passerby.

i like to call this guy,

evil dr. doofenshmirtz.

good news!

the next installment of

"whats on jessica's phone"

will have fabulous pictures

taken by my radical new iphone 4

woot woot!

the end.