Wednesday, March 11, 2009

BN5 Here we go again

Well, I figured even though I keeping this pregnancy under wraps, I still want to document it for future generations to know how it went. So there, I'm not publishing any of the "BN5" posts until I'm good and ready but they ARE here.

On Feb 12th, I dropped Kora off at her gymnastics class and went a couple doors down to get my lip waxed. I had bought a pregnancy test earlier that day because I was late and I was feeling nauseous, but I really didn't expect never do.

Amber was with me and I made her go first while I went to the bathroom, secretly taking my preg test with me. I peed on the stick, shoved it in my wallet, and left the bathroom to get my lip done.

While waiting for Amber I was tempted to look in my wallet for results. It had been the required 3 minutes, but I was SOO nervous. Still, I unzipped my wallet, and peered inside. Two lines. Yes. I'm pregnant. Oh my gosh. I'm freakin pregnant. Five. Five kids was all that flashed in my head. I'm nuts, I'm absolutely nuts. It appears that the counting days method of birth control isn't 99.9% accurate like all the other methods. Who knew you could get pregnant on the last day of your period. Maybe I'm just an idiot, but I sure didn't think it could happen.

That night I sent Austin a text saying, "Didn't you once say that you wanted ONE more baby? If not, then too late." His response? "WHAT?!"

I was kinda bummed about the whole thing. Bummed that I was pregnant, bummed that I was bummed, bummed that I'd have to endure ANOTHER consecutive Summer being large. Just bummed. I assumed that Austin would be the same. We had always KINDA talked about wanting another, but we weren't 100% sure about it. I had decided that we would try to get pregnant right before his first deployment IF we still wanted another one at that time. I guess that Heavenly Father knew if we probably wouldn't happen. And that's probably right.

Austin was surprisingly ecstatic. I didn't expect that at all. It cheered me to hear him be happy. I needed that. I called and told my friend Kempy because I needed some uplifting. It was good to hear her words of advice and hope for me. She encouraged me to make sticky notes all with good points about being pregnant and to stick them on my bathroom mirror so that I can read them each morning and be greeted with words of encouragement. It was a great idea. I did it, and they help...I still read them and on most mornings when I'm puking my guts out...I repeat them in my head like a chant. It's rejuvenating.

So here I am, 8 weeks pregnant. I'm due October 24th and unfortunately, I've been referred to the Naval Hospital for my prenatal care. Not fun, but not much I can do about it.

I've been really nauseous the last few weeks. Like REALLY bad. Smells, tastes and even things I LOOK at make me get sick. For three dinners in a ROW I ordered a meal and when it was brought to the table I got sick immediately before I was able to take even ONE bite. Amber gave me her zofran which was much needed, but I have to use it sparingly because there isn't much left and I won't be able to get more until my first appt on base.

My dry mouth is INSANE. I'm tired tired tired. All I wanna do is hibernate. I can't cook anything or I'll gag but I'm going broke going out to eat. Meat makes me sick and cokes make me sick. I hate this part of the game and I'll be SO happy when it's over in a month or so more.

I AM feeling better about being pregnant though. The notes help and I've realised that everything happens for a reason. Obviously HF knew that I could handle this right now otherwise he wouldn't have made it happen so I'm trusting in him with all my faith.

Next post I'll share what my encouraging notes say. I think you might like that.

Here's to having not 700 kids like I always say...but 900 KIDS!! I saw a woman at church today whose husband is deployed and she had all her kids with her. All five. I said to that's what it looks like when you have 5 kids. It was a lot. 5 looks like SO much more than 4 in person...I'm not sure why, but it does. Pray for me to be able to do this!

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