Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Gauze Panties

If you've never given birth, then you have no clue what I'm talking about. If you HAVE, then you may share the excitement and joy that gauze panties bring into my life. First of all, I Googled this and there are absolutely NO pictures of these beauties anywhere. Maybe some similar versions, but not the real deal. Once I get mine, I'll be sure to take a photo or two and be the first to enter them into the Google hall of fame.
If you're totally confused, let me explain...
Gauze panties are probably one of the greatest inventions ever created. I grew up being a VERY picky child about what I would and wouldn't wear. Most things with tags, seams, uncomfortable material, weird patching or even scratchy edges made me CRINGE. Kora has inherited this gene from me which, although is annoying, I understand. When I was a kid my panties were the biggest issue for me. Most had elastic at the top that I HATED. Most had thick seams on the side that would dig into my hips and leave horrible red marks. Although I found some I could live with, I've always hated clothing that I can FEEL on me.
When I had Jake a miracle occurred. I was given my first pair of GAUZE PANTIES by the hospital staff. At first glance I was embarrassed that I was even being told to put them on, but once on, my world changed. Imagine, if you will, panties made of gauze with NO SEAMS, just all hooked magically together! When you wear these you feel weightless, like you have nothing on at all!! It's the greatest feeling ever!
You of course don't wear these panties forever. Only until you heal or if you're like me, when the gauze starts stretching so much that areas of your bum are hanging out of what used to be tiny holes. The gauze panties DO have a shelf life which is the bad part. The other bad part is that they aren't attractive at all. You wouldn't want to wear these to be sexy so don't even think about it. With Austin gone, I may enjoy my gauze panties even longer than usual!!
Before Amy had her first baby, I told her about the joy of gauze panties. She too enjoyed them. I'm not sure as much as I do, I'm not sure ANYONE enjoys them as much as I do. They're like Heaven for your bottom and they are in my top three of my most favorite parts of giving birth.
(number 1 is the baby, of course and number 2 is the drama...those who know me KNOW I love drama!!)
Dear Gauze Panties,
Gosh, I don't know where to begin. It's been about 5 years since I've seen you last and BOY have I missed you. I don't know if YOU know this, but I'm about to see you again in just 3 days. I can't wait to hug you and squeeze you and put you on my bum. You've always been so great to me and I don't think I've ever told you thank you. I'm posting this on my blog to publicly tell the world how much I appreciate all you do for bottoms around the world. Thanks for being YOU gauze panties.
See you soon, can't wait!
Jessica

17 comments:

Bill and Tara said...

Don't forget to stock up! I made that mistake with Josh, I didn't take the extra that they left in my room. (I found out later that they throw away everything left in the room, even if it's unused, for sanitary purposes). With Eddie, I made sure I wiped the shelf clean the first night, and then more magically appeared the next day, so I got even more. Then as I left, the nurse handed me even more! I went home with a nice supply that saw me through to the very end of healing. LOVE GAUZE PANTIES!!!

Bill and Tara said...

If you can't tell, I love the word "more" when talking about gauze panties. geez I'm lame sometimes. :)

nat said...

i loved them too....i asked the hospital for extras to take home

Lindsay said...

ooooohhh... those sound so exciting... i want some!! they better give me gauze panties when i give birth or i'll cry. I hate tags as much as you do... probably a little bit less... but still. a LOT.

Sandra said...

I love the gauze panties, too! Maybe you'll get a really nice nurse and you can talk her into giving you a bunch.

My true favorite is the squirt bottle, though. That nice, warm stream of water on your sore va-j-j is heaven!

Sigh, that's one of the things I get a little down about from time to time. The whole afterbirth thing is annoying at the time, but I guess because you are so excited about your little baby that those things are remembered in a positive light, too.

Amanda said...

I took extras home too and so did Molly. We did not wear ours out. We washed them on gentle and hung them to dry and have saved them! SO now I have them for my birth center birth:) Already packed and ready to go!

Jess said...

OMG! I am dying laughing over here! I've never worn these magical gauze panties, but I have had the luxury of seeing them and I have to admit...when I saw them...thoughts ran through my head of "ooh...these are so ugly!" But hey...I applaud you for giving up fashion for comfort! :) It will be a test for sure for me!

And from a non-mama....drama?!?! There's drama in L&D?

Dena said...

you are so stupid. :) drama? did you say you like it? you had me laughing.

Janae said...

Ah, leaky breasts, ugly night gowns, and the best, gauze panties. There is something DELIRIOUS about the after-baby life. Maybe it's the pain killers. Maybe it's the joy of having your body back, even if it is hideous. It's weird. I don't mind those "leaky from all places" weeks after the baby. They are magical. Maybe it's wearing gauze panties instead of the other magic under wears we spend our lives in.

Janae said...

P.S. I can't believe your baby is coming so soon! Yay!!!!!!

SM said...

Wow. So now I know how to drive traffic to my blog... post about gauze panties. Easy peasy rice and cheesey!

I, too, loved the gauze panties. I asked for extra when I went home and wore them for a good 2 weeks or so.

the ragsdales said...

I can't wait to try these precious things. but, do they stay on your bum, or are you constantly picking at them? And I feel like the gauze would be sticky, no?

THE RAINES FAMILY said...

I love the gauze panties as well. They are probably the most comfortable thing I've ever worn. I stocked up when I had Chloe. I'm so jealous that you are getting to wear them right now? Will you be wearing them at the party??? :)

Melissa Tanner said...

Jess-
check out this website and see if these are the panties you're talking about. http://www.tristep.com/
they are called "stretch mesh disposable underwear". check it out you can even order a sample pack for .99 cents so you can figure out the size you need. Hope these are the ones!

Melissa Tanner said...

Jessica- I really Did find them this time! the exact ones they have in the hospital. check out this: coloplast corporation is the manufacturer. They are called Net Pants model#: COL5603. I found them through the medicalsupplygroup.com Enjoy your "Net Pants"!

Shyloh Physician Equipment said...

Thank you for this blog! This is probably the most interesting piece of physician equipment I have heard of! I love your positive attitude and honesty in your writing, I am definitely going to check back for more!

Anonymous said...

am suffering with shingles in the buttocks area and have only 1 pair of the fabulous gauze panties from a prior hospital stay. where can I buy these panties? thank you.