Friday, April 18, 2008

A list of Jubilee Junk

1. I let the kids paint today, well, Kora and Miah. I get so stressed out when potential messes can occur, I don't know why. I would be such a HORRIBLE teacher. I don't think I'm a perfectionist completely, BUT I have this crazy desire for everything to look and BE perfect so kids painting makes me go NuTs! I get all upset when the colors in the tray get mixed together and they don't clean their brushes off before switching colors. It's insane, I'm really stupid about it. I should just relax but my "stay-in-the-lines" mentality makes me flip. Just so they could actually ENJOY themselves, I had to clean the kitchen while they did it so I wouldn't watch them and get anxious.

2. Jake stayed home from school today. He started throwing up last night after dinner and then into the night. He stopped at about 1am, but I still kept him home. I always had a fear of throwing up at school in front of my friends and I didn't want that to possibly happen to him. I think it's one of the most embarrassing things that could happen to a kid. That and peeing your pants at school which my mom did once when she was little. She was so embarrassed about it because a boy she liked asked her what all that was on the floor and she said she thought her chair was leaking oil.

3. Truancy. I know I've touched on this subject before but I must vent again. Today will be Jake's 8th un-excused absence from school and he is only allotted 2 more before the year is over. Why do I know this useless information you ask? Because I get a freakin letter in the mail EVERY time he stays home telling me that he's on the verge of a truancy violation and I better watch it. I HATE this policy. I HATE HATE HATE the stupid school absence issue. First of all, does the school system think that I'm going to take my child to the doctor EVERY SINGLE TIME he gets a fever, throws up, has a sick stomach, or a runny nose?? What the heck? NO! So why would I have a excuse from the doctor? And the funny thing is, when I DO send him to school feeling sick, they call me and tell me to pick him up and then RAG on me about how I shouldn't send him to school when he's feeling bad because he could get other kids sick. Huh...ya think?!?! Regardless of his straight A record he's had ALL YEAR LONG, they think he's missed much to much school to know what's going on. SCREW YOU TRUANCY!!!!!!!!!!

4. Only 8 more days before the love of my life goes away :(

5. Speaking of my lover...I've been thinking about how I have many names for my love. Usually it's "Babe" or "Lover" and then sometimes I'll throw in an occasional "Luv" for short. I was wondering what makes couples come up with names for each other and why, if they use one or two of the typical names, do they not use the others?? Like I have never in my life called Austin "Honey" but this is a very popular name for a lot of couples. Tell me what you call YOUR significant other and why (if you even know...I don't!)

6. I had to make a really huge poster for a church activity we are having on Saturday called "The Family Olympics". Each family is coming as a team to compete against each other for fun. (Only Mormons would all have enough people in their family for an event such as this!!) The person in charge asked me to make the main sign so I've been stressing about making sure it's perfect (refer to #1 about being perfect). I'm finally finished and I hope it's what she wants. I'll be sure to take a picture before I let it go and be displayed for the entire church to view...yikes. OH and wish us luck in the competition...we are making a family flag with a peacock on it as our team symbol. I'll be sure to get that picture as well!!

7. I love trash. I love throwing things away and clearing stuff out. I especially like doing this when big changes happen in our family. It makes me feel cleansed. With Austin leaving in only 8 days I have felt the sudden urge to throw everything away and clean every crevasse of junk OUT. Does anyone else share this compulsion?

I've decided that I'm done being pregnant. I'm finished. I'm really DONE. I hate that I have 10 more grueling weeks left. I hate that my stomach is so heavy and my back hurts. I hate how I have to sit or lie down for a minute to catch my breath after walking up the stairs. I'm tired of BEING tired all the time. I'm tired of eating. I DREAD when it's time for a meal because I hate having to think about WHAT to eat. I hate how my legs look like tree trunks because they're so chubby. I hate how pale I am and how deathly it makes me feel. It's an un-natural and not healthy looking pale. The scary, "I just saw a ghost" pale. I hate when I am about to get in the tub and I catch a glimpse of my nude self in the mirror and I don't know who I am. I miss ME. I feel stuck and claustrophobic that I will have to remain in this foreign body for 10 more weeks. I wanna get out. I hate the chalky taste of Tums but I'm forced to eat them several times daily. My prenatal vitamins make me burp fish burps and I hate that. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up until it's over. Remind me of this post when Isaak is 3 years old and I get this CrAzY idea that I want to have another baby. Remind me of how much I HATE being pregnant.

9. That being said, I love this baby growing inside of me and the kicking games he plays with me as I push his tiny feet from the outside of my belly. I love him so much and I'm SO thankful I'm ABLE to carry him. I just wish it wasn't for 9 months +. Why can't we be like dogs and have a gestational period of only 8 weeks? Enough to enjoy it, but not long enough to get sick of it. Heck I'd even do 20 weeks!

10. I don't have more to say but I couldn't end on 9...I hate that number....9 months....whatever...


Valinda said...

I'm sorry, about only 8 more days, about you still being pregnant, about the retarded truancy thing. In answer to #5 he's Baby, never babe.Sometimes sexy, or lover. I loved your very sparkly poster.

Unknown said...

Sorry you're feeling craptacular. That's no fun. It will soooo be worth it, as you know.

And that truancy thing IS stupid!

Amanda said...

The absence rule sounds crazy in your district!

Tara said...

Ok Jess, if you ever want to have a serious down and dirt talk about sucky school districts, I'm you gal. We have been going through some stupid stuff with Josh recently, and we have just pulled out both the kids. (going to a charger school, thanks to grandparents). I feel for you, some of the rules are just STUPID!

This is out of order, but I am the same way about cleaning and painting. It is SO nice to have my own room for that, I hated the kids painting in the kitchen, but would do it anyway. I came up with a system for keeping the paint colors clean. Josh got it down right away, it's simple. I make sure the water colors are on a paper towel for each kid, they have their own cup and brush. I wet the paints before they start so there is no need for the "grinding" to get color. They they chant "swish, swish, swish....tap, tap, tap". They do that before EVERY color change, and it's amazing how it keeps them clean. Not perfect, but it really helps, and for some reason, they always thought it was fun to learn. They would swish their brushed in the water, then tap them on the edge of the cup, and THEN get color. If they needed too, they would blot inbetween, but usually swishing and tapping to the chant was enough to clean the brushes, tap off JUST enough water so they still had a moist brush to collect the paint, and it would minimize the mess. Try it sometime. Tell me how it goes when you do.

I hated that last trimester too. I was put on meds because I hated it so much! I feel for you on that one too!

As for names, Bill and I are odd. We do not have specific sides of the bed, or official pet names, we call each other a whole slew of things, or abreveations of those names. Just whatever we feel like. Funny, we call each other so many different names, it's actually a rare treat to hear him call me by my REAL name. I know psychologists would probably analyze our marriage by this, but I don't mind it, and I love him more and more every year no matter what we call each other. :)

sorry this is so long. Had alot to say. :)

Tara said...

sorry about all the type errors in that last book of a comment, I typed fast and didn't read over before publishing it. Anyway, take care, and I hope you have a wonderful week with your hubby!

Lindsay said...

sorry it's taken me so long to post a comment on this.. i've been really sick and i haven't wanted to read.. it makes me frustrated. Stupid school rules. I think i'll punch the principal in his/her sleep. Sorry about being pregnant. I dont know what it's like but.... well.. someday i will right? I'm sorry you're sad and uncomfortable. your sign looks nice. :)