Monday, February 4, 2008

Baby BOY blues...

So yes, we got the news today about what the baby is. Before we went IN to the doctor, I prepped Kora by telling her, "we're gonna be happy no matter what the baby is, right? No throwing fits, okay?" Like my brainwashing method? Well so we all went as a family and she showed us the head, arms, legs, mouth, eyes, nose, oh yeah...and the penis and nut sack (yea, she actually said that!) So I look over at Kora and she has this fake half smile goin on when I say, "Did ya hear that Kora? It's a boy!" The doctor printed out the pictures and I gave them to Kora knowing she would need the most proof out of all of us.

We walked outside talking and joking about having another boy. We told Miah he was going to have a brother and he said, "A brother bear?" like the movie. Everyone was laughing but Kora, she just kept staring at the pictures. I knew she was holding it in because of my pep talk. Her eyes and nose were getting red and it was getting harder for her not to cry. When we got in the car I said, "Kora, I know you’re sad (her chin started to quiver) and if you want to cry, you can." At that point, she just broke down. Austin was hugging her and she kept saying, "I just wanted a little sister so bad." It was painful, I started bawling too because I know how much this hurt her. Even Austin's eyes got a little glassy and then Jake started tearing up too. I think it was harder for all of US to see her so sad knowing there was nothing we could do to make it better. I reminded her that Heavenly Father knows what he's doing and right now he thinks that she and I need to be the only girls in the family. That didn't help, she was devastated.

To try to make things better, I had already planned for us to go shopping for the baby's first few outfits. On the way there she kept holding the pictures and looking at them and then she said, "Maybe it really IS a girl because these pictures just have white and black on them and maybe the lady doesn't really know for sure." UUGGH...a knife in my heart. I explained to her that this lady's job was to take these sonograms and she knows what things to look for so she's probably right. I tried to make her feel better by saying that baby boys are just as sweet as baby girls and her come back was, "Miah's not!" Haha.

At the stores she loosened up a bit and had fun picking out the clothes. I told her she could pick out the first outfit the baby will wear when it comes home so she felt pretty proud. Every now and then she would sway to the pink side of the store and I'd have to pull her back to the blue, but hey...I kept doing that too!

Five minutes ago I asked her if she was feeling better about things and about having ANOTHER brother and she said, "Yeah, I'm feelin MUCH better." So I think it was just the initial realization and shock that she wasn't going to have a sister...well, at least not for now.

Now, many of you are asking me about names and although we are not 100% positive about ANY name, we like Isaak Keith and a few others. This is the part where I get psycho stressed because I want to make sure the name is absolutely PERFECT since the kid WILL have to keep it for the remainder of its life. I hope I'm able to find something that gives me that "right" feeling, ya know? In the beginning I knew it was a boy, but after a few weeks I started feeling positive that it was a girl so I focused on girl names and I found the perfect one that I knew was just "right". Well, now that I won't be using that name, I have to switch gears and at this point none of our boy names give me that "right" feeling just yet. Gimme some 20 more weeks and then I'll have it figured out. OH...and don't ask me what that girl name was, I'm putting that in storage for safe keeping *wink*


Amanda said...

That almost made me cry too:( Hey--at least you have one girl:) And boys are fun too--as you already know. Of course it might be hard to change Kora's mind--no matter what! I totally Know what you mean about the name being perfect! YIKES! If we have a boy I have NO IDEA on names.....I have looked at a lot and none fit yet! I do have a girl name that I am 90% sure on.....Which probably means we will have a boy too:) Post some pictures of the outfit Kora picked out--for fun--and so we can all tell her it's perfect:)

Lindsay said...

Tell Kori that it's okay and that Ni loves her. I know that won't help and you probably won't do it but... still. I love Kora and her crazy antics... she's gonna love holding the new baby! :) I'm a little bummed too because i thought it was a girl as well... oh well... maybe you can give him a pretty girl name and say you meant for it to be that way. HA!

Vagabond Mother said...

At least for Kora "only" girls rock. Once any of you lay eyes on that boy, you won't trade him for the world. I had to take back pink pumas after Henry's ultrasound. It was tough.

Sandra Huntsman said...

Oooh, that's heartbreaking!

When we went in for Ryder's ultrasound, Piper (my 5 year old) was really hoping for a baby sister. When the tech said "Who wants a baby brother?" Chloe - 5 at the time said "Yes! I was correct!" because that's what she guessed. But Piper proceeded to argue with the tech that it's a baby SISTER! Well, I guess she wished REALLY hard because she did get a little sister just 19 months after her brother.


I totally understand wanting a girl...especially since it would probably be just as sweet as Kora, but it will be fun to see what kind of personality this little boy will have. Congratulations!

Tara said...

Man, do I know what you went through! Jade started to cry the SECOND the lady said it was a boy, and she didn't stop sobbing for over a half hour. We were at Applebees for a while before she stopped crying. We did the same thing, let her pick out outfits, that helped. Also, I let her help me look at nursery colors, (even though we didn't do a nursery), and she drew pictures and did creative things for the baby. I made a REALLY big deal about how she gets to be the only girl, never has to share her room, get's to be daddy's princess forever. Whenever we have "girl-time" it will always be just us, she never has to share that part of her life. It might be a bit different for you if you plan on having any more kids. We knew we were done after Eddie. Honestly, I think the biggest thing that helped was knowing that she didn't have to share a room, and she could decorate it ANY way she wanted, for as long as she lives. :)

Also, I am going to dig out a picture of myself pregnant 3 weeks later than the pics on my blog. You will see how I REALLY looked, and I'm not kidding when I said "angles" make a difference. I looked about a foot wider in all directions when the photos were taken head-on vs. from up high looking down. Seriously, I had honest friends making comments like, "Holy crap Tara, I can't believe how big your tummy is!". so don't pay attention to the pictures. I just thought it was fun to see the kids faces in anticipation of a new brother, (and my silky-thick hair that is now gone!)

Amy Herfurth said...

Lauren & Kora can be sisters instead of cousins!

Marian said...

WOW! what an emotional roller coaster the 4th must have been. You really do relate so well to little people.

Please tell Kora that her Great Aunt Marian had 4 brothers and NOT ONE sister. And say that she too always wanted a sister, but that brothers are also cool because they look out for and protect their sisters, and it's not only their 'big' brothers who do so -- even little brothers, like her Paw Paw being protective of his big sister (that would be me).

I quite like Amy's thought because I think of Teresa (Maw Maw) as the sister I never had.

Love ALL the Lowes and the new, 'flash' peacock.